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Vocal demo! New song

Hello please listen if you want :)

feel free to comment on the singing


  • highmtnhighmtn Posts: 14,569Administrator, Moderator, Enrolled, Pro
    Hi, Jonas.

    If you don't mind, I would like to comment on your songwriting. This is just my opinion, and others may think otherwise. That's fine.

    Because of the nature of the lyrics: Sadness, hurt, etc. I think you should change the cadence of your lyrics. In other words, a line like
    "But we wanted it to work" you are saying it very rapidly. This is about feelings and pain, so I would do it more like:

    Buuuuuuuuut, we waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan-teeeeeeeeeeeeed iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit to

    See what I mean? Sustain those vowels and don't chop it up so fast into a lot of consonants. The vowels are where you get to express your feelings.

    I don't mean to intrude on your songwriting, but we're amongst friends here.

    All the Best.

  • Ah Bob thanks i haven't thought about that at all

    I'm really glad you commented on it

    Thanks again :)
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