Looking for feedback on a song

claytondb

Hi everyone,

I'm looking for feedback from you on a song, and my singing/writing in general.
Here's a link ("Dandelions"): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ig10sN8G4HE
Also, if you feel like diving in deeper and have time, here's another song ("We Will Get By"): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dvn0kjfKTvk

I've been doing KTVA on and off for about a year. I'm always looking to get better, so any feedback you can provide on my singing would help me. If you're interested, I have other songs and covers on that channel too. Let me know what you think.

Thanks in advance!

Wigs

I quite liked this! Cant really help you with the composition or lyrics because I barely know anything about it, but try get better cord closure on your low notes, I know the feel of the song is quite gentle and soft but getting more resonance on the bottom end would sound good.

shining

Beautiful songs and singing

Klaus_T

i like it! the writing is good, very good on "dandelions" actually in my opinion. keep going!

i listened to your landslide cover, and there i think i heard that you lose quite a bit of air, so working on your support would be something to focus on. but you are on a good track anyway

and for the singing exercise, since you say you do it on and off: do it consistently instead

DogMeat

Good song. I think the transition from verse to chorus could use some work. Both verse and chorus are good on their own, but the transition felt like a sudden jump. Sometimes thats a good thing, but in this kind of calming and romantic song it could actually work better to be quite predictable for the listener.

claytondb

Thanks for the feedback everyone!
@Klaus_T - I’m glad you noticed how hard it is for me to sing without using so much air, I wasn’t sure if that was just me or if I’m really using too much air. I’m struggling with creating a smooth sound, I feel like my voice jumps all over the place and gets scratchy/painful as I move into head voice, which is probably from too much air.
@Wigs - good call, I should focus on getting that better cord closure, I usually end up taking the easy way out and it turns into sort of a whisper.
@DogMeat - I appreciate it, the song could benefit from a better transition. Actually you make a good point because this is something other songs of mine struggle with, I think it’s something I generally can work on.

Thanks for the excellent and specific input everyone!

Klaus_T

it's pretty common to struggle with overusing air/support, if you follow the program, you will get it right.

DeltonHedges

@claytondb
hey. This is great. Been looking for some sincere singer/songwriter. I'm new around here, but so pleased to discover you. Will listen to more soon. Feedback? just for me and my compromised hearing, I couldn't make out all the lyrics which was really frustrating in such a heartfelt song. More force I guess, or like the others are saying more technically. Keep it up.

KarenSings

Lovely, sweet song!
An idea for you for practicing your vocals: Even if you want your final presentation to be guitar/vocal performance, you can practice your vocal delivery with a recording of your guitar. This allows you to put the full attention on the vocal, and create a habit of good support for your vocal, which will carry over to your guitar/vocal performance. Maybe you already thought of this.
You have a very pleasing voice. The words were super clear to me.