Bon jovi_ cover

jimiwayne

Whats up Singers,
I hope I did all this right with sound cloud. If I didn't perhaps some good advice as to the how/ could be summoned. Anyway, I've had the coarse for a month or so and have only been able to work it for 2_weeks. School, life__bla, bla. But wanted to get feedback with where I am so far. hope it works.
: never-say-goodbye-b-jovi-cover
Jimi Wayne

highmtn

Jimiwayne sent this to us offline and we responded. I encouraged him to post on the forum so that all could benefit from his learning experience, and he agreed and said it was OK to post the exchange on the forum. I'm clumsy with the editor, so the messages below may be messy, but please forgive me if that is the case. Rayhan or Scott may be able to clean it up a bit better than me. Anyway, the following posts with double headers will be our exchange off-line. I would do this in one Copy/Paste, but the editor tells me it exceeds the limit by 3,763 characters, so I'll try to do it in chunks. 

Everyone can learn from one another's demos and we all benefit from the experience. Bob

highmtn

sspatrickJuly 21

Hey Jimi, I took a listen it's one of my favorite tunes from growing up. In the verse you were a little off pitch almost singing a harmony to the original melody. It's sound like you can the playguitar, what I do if I'm having trouble with a melody is find the notes on yhe guitar and work on the song one line at a time. Match each note as best you can. The tone of your voice in the higher sections is close to where you want to be, pretty good support, and nice and bright. You could support more in the lower sections to tighten up the sound. I hope this helps, keep at it you are on the right track. Really focus on nailing those pitches in the verse.

highmtn

jimiwayneJuly 21

Scott, Thanks man really does help_ that is direct easy to understand and specific notes that I can begin to correct__ thanks a gazill and for the compliments.

highmtn

KokonuhtzJuly 21

A question! What volume are you on

highmtn

highmtnJuly 21

Jimiwayne,

I agree with Scott's comments. The pitch at 1:18 is incorrect, but at ths same part of the song the next two times it sounded much better. Ask yourself what you were doing and thinking differently at those different places of the same part of the song. You have a good voice to work with. Support is going to be something that can help your voice to blossom and develop. We all need to improve our support and that includes me. I'd like to hear a little more brightness from your voice.

As I've stated on the forum, I am a big fan of Too Much Reverb, however I would like to hear your direct voice clearer, at least on one side of the stereo spectrum. That would help on tracks you want evaluated, so we can pick your vocal out of the wash and give you better tips. Also, the very long delay (sounds like about a One-Second delay almost) doesn't help. It's so long after the original sound that it only contributes confusion and mud, it doesn't really reinforce your voice like a shorter delay might. Again, I would suggest using this effect only sparingly. We like effects to help smooth out the blemishes in our voices, but when asking for evaluations, we should be sure that the listener can hear our actual voice clearly enough through the mix to give us worthwhile pointers.

You are wise to record yourself and to ask for evaluations. Don't be afraid to put it on the main forum where others going through the same things can hear and benefit from your learning experience. It helps to encourage others to put up their own demos, which is helpful to all.

Keep recording yourself and listen very closely to the playback. Be honest with yourself and sometimes turn off all of the reverb and echo and make sure you are not masking any pitch issues. You can do this privately for your own feedback, and it will open your eyes. I find that when I do this, it gives me a reality check that I need from time-to-time.

Keep working. You have much to work with, and there is a universe of improvement we all can bring into our voices. This program is the route to that betterment.

Bob

highmtn

KokonuhtzJuly 21

Just gotta say that I have never listened to this song before haha. So I can't really tell much about the melody. As for other aspects... The part where you say Never say goodbye. I hear it as if you're saying "Never say Goobye". I think it would sound nicer if you did said Goodbye but remember to keep the throat open while pronouncing the "d" as it's a consonants thats produced by the tip of the tongue. Just gently get the d sound then quickly get out of that consonant and keep that throat open. (Even at the end of the song you say "Goobye", I'm now wondering if this is a slang thing?)

Another point would be pitch. Even though i don't know the melody but I can tell it's off pitch here and there. Scott's tip is pretty good for pitch training ;D.

Support is pretty good as well. From what I can hear. Also, I think that you should cover the sound that much? Making it dark I mean.

Ken did mentioned before that when you cover a sound, it will sound a tad bit lower and makes it easier for you to get off pitch. A brighter tone and sound will be more spot-on the pitching. Also it sounds like you're covering the sound to different extents. Sometimes you cover it a whole lot then you cover a little bit. Might just be me but yeah.. XD! Doesn't sound... natural to me . Personal opinion ;D!

Vowel modifications as well. I personally... can't hear much vowel modifications? Open throat is another important thing that you have to remember. Most of the times you throat isn't fully open. Or at least that what I think I hear. Remember to try and have that yawning sensation at the back of your throat to keep the throat open! Without open throat, your voice might also have that regurgitating sound sometimes.. which I do hear... Anyone else hears that ? XD

Aside from that... your high notes sound pretty good! They're bright, on pitch (I think?), supported (would be nice if there were more support). You're doing a pretty good job on not over enunciating the consonants as well ;D. Just remember to keep that throat open and do your vowel modifications!

Agreed with Scott and Bob as well .

Don't forget support support support!!

jimiwayne

Rahan, thanks man for your input. I've had the program since June 7th started lesson 1 and did that for about 2 weeks then had to quit as does life happens. Just recorded that the other day without any warm ups or working the program. Your advice, as well as, everyone critique is very crucial to my growth for sure. I have printed out the critiques as to us them at my studio during practice.  This way I can be thorough in my efforts. That is why I really appreciate the critiques from you, Bob, and Scott. They are definitely directional which is helpful to my lack of discipline. Also, thanks for the compliments they encourage me to focus more. I agree that the FX need to go when looking for critique. It is certainly confusing. I will post a cleaner demo once I've had time to correct the areas pointed to. Also once I've worked the program a little more [lol]. Thanks Scott, Bob, and Rahan for your help. You guys rock/.
Jimi Wayne

highmtn

;^)